Rhys' second and final month with us

In my previous post, I talked about Rhys' first month with us.  Here now is my account of his 2nd and final month (July 2 - August 6) with us.

As I look back on his last month with us, I remember that his behavior was escalating to the point that he was becoming unruly and undisciplined.  It's probably because he's beginning to realize that his mom was not taking him back and that his being with us isn't a vacation but an actual transfer.  He realizes that his mom doesn't exactly show him enough love because he comments about the fact that the things I do with Dana and Dylan he doesn't experience with his mom.  He also has had to face ugly facts about his life - like Jericho not being his real dad and that he doesn't actually know who his real dad is except for his name.  He also keeps on looking at the kids' photo albums which document most of their childhood, something that he doesn't have, the physical photos, not the childhood.

So I can understand the reasons for his acting up.  However, things are being aggravated by the fact that his mom has up to this time refused to give her financial contribution to us - something that we're also desperately in need of because, to be honest, we aren't exactly rolling in money and, let's face it, an added mouth to feed really needs additional finances.  It's also what the siblings have agreed upon so...

Things kind of came to a head on July 16th, when we had to take him back to his mom because he and I had a showdown.  While he's here, I would supervise his and Dylan's homework and I noticed that Ate Mel was getting really frustrated with him because he wasn't paying attention.  Ate Mel can't teach Dylan until Rhys was finished and it was taking them a long time.  When I took over the study session, he was supposed to memorize our address for an oral exam in school.  It took him 5 hours before he actually did it.  It was just too much.  I will no longer go into the details but I tried every sort of technique to get him to memorize but it wasn't getting into his head.  My son who had a speech problem was able to memorize the address faster than him and that's saying a lot!  Needless to say, I had frayed nerves and that kind of behavior extended over up to the next day and Patrick was here at that time and he observed how Rhys was and it was he who decided that the stress levels in the house were going through the roof and that it was time for the family to take a break from him.

He stayed with Stevie and Toni from July 18 to July 21.  He had to return to our house because Friday, he had an ID Picture taking for school.  On Monday (July 18), I had to go to his school to ask Teacher Dory for some patience because we still hadn't paid for Rhys' school. While Rhys was with Stevie and Toni, Patrick talked with Dimples about her plans for her son.  Apparently, she was planning on moving to a new apartment and not taking into consideration that her son will have to travel far to get to his school.  Her solution, that he stop schooling.  Our original recommendation was for her to find an apartment somewhere closer to where her son goes to school, so she can still have someone caring for him while she's working and that she can take Rhys back when she comes back from work, preferably that she also get a day shift, for both their sake.

Rhys returned Friday but spent the weekend with her mom and Jericho.  This struck me funny because it was supposed to be just the two of them.  Bringing Jericho back into the equation makes me think that she needed someone else to take care of her son.  Anyway, it turned out that making him spend time with his mom backfired because after that, he was just crying non-stop everyday.  No matter how many times I explain to him, he will just cry and cry the whole day, even while in school.  He was also very disruptive in class requiring Teacher Dory to put him a bit further away from his classmates.  His situation was aggravated too when Dimples was supposed to pick him up for lunch during the weekend (July 31) but she arrived late in the afternoon.  She also didn't want to pay the full amount of P5K for the month of June until Patrick left her no choice so she complied.

On Monday, I was able to pay the school from the money that she gave.  All through the week, Rhys was just crying although to be honest, after his talk with Erghie about remembering his mom even while she wasn't here helped a little.  When Dimples was here that Sunday, she mentioned that she's hiring a babysitter to look after Rhys in their apartment which meant that she'll be getting Rhys by Friday.  Unfortunately, the yaya didn't arrive as planned but we felt that it was a blessing in disguise.  It meant that she would be able to take care of her son by herself so on Saturday, we brought Rhys back with her for good.

It was a relief to have him gone from our lives.  Peace settled in.  It's unfortunate though that she didn't continue his education.  At first, I was worried but I let it go.  It wasn't my responsibility anymore.  If she doesn't want to sacrifice her easygoing ways and focus on raising her kid right, that's her problem not mine.  She hasn't even paid for her financial support for July.  Enough said on that...

Goodbye and Good Riddance!