Thoughts of the Dead

If you believe that a person's spirit comes back to check on you and watch over you, then I believe my mom comes back in the form of a dragonfly. Always, on special occasions and on not so special ones, I usually find one in the house and always in the same place. Like the past couple of days, there has always been a dragonfly in the house.. when the kids see it, they always say, "Hi, Lola Benggoy!" Lola Benggoy is what they call their grandma :)

I figured, it's nearing her favorite grandchild's birthday so she's dropping in and I miss her even more..

Anyway, yesterday we went out to Quiapo to get my debit card for Paypal. While walking the streets of Quiapo, I couldn't help but remember when my mom and I used to come here to go to church, buy really cheap clothes (yeah!) and eat at Ma Mon Luk. She really loved the noodles here and so do I and so do Den and the kids. It was funny, coz one of Den's friends, Richard also came with us and he hadn't heard of Ma Mon Luk (oh what a sacrilege!) so I felt it was my duty to educate him on the finer things about noodles hehehe and true enough, he loved it and will take his family and friends there as well hehehehe

So when we came home, I was thinking pretty nice things about Mom and Ma Mon Luk and while Den was opening the door, a strange thing happened. For no particular reason, I expected Shadow, my mom's dog to bark as he usually does when he hears us coming home. But Shadow has been dead for over a year! I felt a chill run up my spine. And even stranger, Den stopped opening the door and looked at me and said, "I was expecting to hear Shadow barking!".. imagine that, the same thought!! it was strange and creepy, yet kind of like part of the mood...

my mom said that when Shadow died, she could smell her all the way up in California.. At first, she didn't know what the smell in her office was until she saw my email about Shadow's death.. and then she realized it for what it was - Shadow was saying goodbye to her...

I miss my mom.. wish I had a new dog..


  1. Hi, Che! I lost my beloved dog last Aug. 4. She's a labrador retriever..been with us for 3 yrs. and 3 months. My daughter and I felt her presence 2-3 days after her death...felt her walking the steps of the staircase leading towards the house. She's the only one who could make such sounds so we knew it was her. We cried when we lost her coz she's sweet and very friendly. She was my companion especially when I was left all alone at home.
    =Cecille P.(

  2. My brother, Allan, also emailed to tell me that when Shadow died, he felt her presence in their apartment in the States. he heard her (Shadow's) panting in their room. Creepy! He didn't know she died until my mom came home and told him the news.


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