Nuffnang

Another baby on the way --->

And no, it's not mine! hahaha No, it's going to be Den's.  

October 25 is that landmark day when I found out that my 20-year old niece is going to have a baby.  I was so busy with another person's kid that I totally neglected to observe that my very own niece, who's living in the same house as I, is pregnant.  Imagine my surprise and consternation when I noticed that her tummy was kinda big that you can't mistake it for simply being full from food.

Not wanting to confront her immediately, I just made a joke hoping that she'll bite.  But she just made a noncommittal shrug which inflamed my suspicions even more.  Then I started counting back and checking how fast we ran out of sanitary pads as I kept racking my brain for signs of pregnancy that I didn't see.  See, if her tummy was already showing then that meant that it was in the 2nd trimester already and I totally missed the first trimester!  And that's when I realized that I must have been so preoccupied with the Boy Who Will Not Be Named that I didn't notice her pregnancy signs.

So, that night, Patrick and I asked her straight on.  Her answer was, "Kailangan pa bang itanong yan?" which roughly translates to "Do you even need to ask?"  I was really pissed at the answer.  Here we were, asking politely and nicely and that's the reply we got.  I think she was being an ass to cover her real feelings as teenagers are wont to do.  But then the truth was out.  She was pregnant and going on 5 months.

Needless to say, my world collapsed.  I wanted her to finish college (she had a semester to go for crying out loud!).  I wanted her to enjoy her life as a single person.  I wanted her to travel.  I wanted her to make more out of herself before she even had to THINK about having a baby...

What was the point of our talks about pills and condoms and all those irresponsible parents littering the streets with their offspring?!  They're becoming one of them!  I was so frustrated that they didn't use their heads.  I was so frustrated that they didn't protect themselves.  I wanted to strangle the boyfriend for not using birth control.  I wanted to strangle Den for not insisting that the boyfriend use protection!

Naturally, the first reaction would be surprise, then shock, then anger, then acceptance.  For both my sister (her mother) and I, it was rather easy because of the maternal instincts for the baby kicking in.  We had to make sure that the baby was safe and healthy.  For the men in our lives, it was really anger that's the reigning emotion.    Saying they were pissed off was an understatement.  They wanted to meet with the boyfriend and his family ASAP.  At the time of writing, that hasn't happened yet.

I don't think I will truly get over the regret and the frustration but all I can do right now is provide the support she needs because stress is not good for the baby.  I have told her that she needs to finish her last semester so she'll have a better opportunity even after the baby is born.   

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